How's the 'fro?

Transcripts from an interview with Rachel's hair, taken from Sunday April 6, 2008 (6:31 p.m.)

Interviewer: Welcome, welcome!! Chill out, relax... well don't relax
Afro: (Chuckles) Hi
Interviewer: (Nervously) I'll just get right down to it, okay?
Afro: Shoot
Interviewer: How old are you?
Afro: (Counts on her fingers) Hmm... about 7 months old.
Interviewer: Wow! (scribbles something on notepad) How's it been growing up and stuff
Afro: It's been alright, could have been better. I get washed way too often.
Interviewer: How do you feel about that?
Afro: Dry (gets quiet and stares out of the window)
Interviewer: OOOOOkay, um...I hear you are curly, do you think that you are?
Afro: Hey you know, you can't believe everything people tell you. Those are just rumors, I'm a bit more complicated than that.
Interviewer: I heard that you're soft too. (shuffles notes) On Sunday January 20th, direct quote from Sister Roach after touching you, "Rachel, its so soft." Is that true?
Afro: Well that's good, I try to make myself approachable. Softness is a part of that. So is sheen, we've been working on moisture.
Interviewer: Do you ever go out still wet?
Afro: All the time, it was a problem in winter though. Those were harsh times. The extremes in temperatures. I'm glad the weather has eased up some, I'm a bit less stressed.
Interviewer: I'm glad, now on to your past, how long were you incarcerated in your relaxed form?
Afro: Oh no, not this again. All you interviewers are the same, always throwing the past in my face. Okay, okay, yes! I used to be a pixie cut, a bob, a french roll, but most of the time a pony tail. I quite enjoyed my ponytail days if you must know....I'm not ashamed of that time. I've just moved on you know.
Interviewer: (patting Afro) Yes, I know. Thank you for being so gracious.
Afro: Well thanks for having me atop your head. (winks and then glistens)